Sometimes our children are the role models we need. My daughter has astounded me recently. Truly blown me away. She’s stoic, compassionate, kind, brave and rational. She’s 13. Can I at 40 emulate this? I’m not sure. She’s been brutally forced to face her deepest strengths at a time when most are working out their most adventurous back flip off the climbing frame.
The hideous impact of Bullying
Bullying has hit her world brutally, cruelly and as always with bullying, utterly inexplicably. She’s been victimized and accused of vileness she had no part in. We don’t know why the venom began (from dear friends no less), nor why things escalated so dramatically.
She has been ostracized from an entire year group, with rumors rife, continually abounding and social media attacks on a scale that make me wince.
And yet, despite vomiting before school in the morning through fear, despite weeping in my arms each evening before sleep, she touched me so deeply with wisdom last night.
Deep Touching Wisdom
Sitting on her bed stroking her luscious, never-ending hair, she sat up and said
“I am not going to cry any more over this. I’ve decided that I actually feel really sorry for these girls. The fact that in life you have each moment only once, and only once, means that they are wasting all of these precious moments on vindictive thoughts and actions. That poison must be so bad for their bodies and minds and they can’t ever get this time back. Every moment is so precious. I feel so sad that they are wasting their lives thinking about me. What a waste! I hope they come to realize this soon. In the meantime I will focus on the things that make me happy, like my good, kind friends, my school work and my family and hopefully they’ll grow out of this sad phase soon. I will walk away from them, smile at them and send them love before I sleep each night.”
The spiritual wisdom flowing in one so young fills my heart with joy and pride. She has taken adversity and at her tender age used it as an opportunity for spiritual growth. She’s taken the situation as a lesson rather than a burden.
From that moment on she held her head high, walked with purpose and kindness in her heart and 6 months later I am calmly elated to know the juvenile nastiness has indeed lessened and my daughter seems more loved, happy and serene than ever.
I recommend you look to your teens for wisdom sometimes too. Listen to their life views. They have fresh new perspectives that are sometimes the most vibrant and sparkly of gems.