Dr. Marina Kostina: “We are creating a movement of joyful women who live ravenously”

Oh. We ARE creating a movement! A movement of joyful women who live ravenously. I am organizing a yearly women empowerment conference where we will recognize women not for their outer beauty or their achievements but for their thirst for life, for their ability to have Joie de vivre I had the pleasure of interviewing […]

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Oh. We ARE creating a movement! A movement of joyful women who live ravenously. I am organizing a yearly women empowerment conference where we will recognize women not for their outer beauty or their achievements but for their thirst for life, for their ability to have Joie de vivre

I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Marina Kostina, an award winning life and business fulfillment coach, a healer, An Amazon bestselling author and a speaker, seven-time recipient of the United States Department of Defense grants. Dr. Kostina’s work has been featured in such prominent media sources as USA Today, Telemundo, Chicago Tribune, Hay House Radio, and People Magazine. She is also a contributing author to the Authority Magazine, Thrive Global and Buzzfeed. Her book Find the G-Spot of Your Soul: How to Move from Lethargic to Ravenous Living is set to be published on January 15, 2018.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Can you tell us a story about what brought you to this specific career path?

I was a disruptor ever since I was a little girl. I grew up in the Soviet Union. At that time economy was really poor and my mom and I had to stand in long lines for food and household items. I was five years old. I remember entertaining the crowd of people waiting in line with us. I recall wearing a long skirt and playing with a tambourine, my long hair loose and floating…and I danced. I danced to celebrate my beauty and my femininity — a young girl reveling in her loveliness, my dancing putting smiles on the faces around me, providing a stark contrast to our bleak circumstances. I was happy and full inside, filled with love for myself, and I had so much love inside me to give back. I was powerful, and that was scary to others. As I grew up, instead of gaining admiration and support for my feminine, free-spirited behavior, I heard more and more often to stop being “so darn powerful, so energetic, so brave.” It is fascinating how, on some subconscious level, society detected the powerful sexual energy in a little girl, and, fearing it, conspired to make her suppress it.

Ever since I always defined the “norms”, always rebelled against being “put in a box”. My life probably feels very disruptive to others — I moved to another country, quit a “safe” academic world after getting my PhD, had two failed businesses and started my third one in my late thirties. Unfortunately my marriage also did not satisfy the standards of the society. My divorce left me broke and brokenhearted, and I was sleeping literally on the floor of the dance studio where I taught Zumba for some time before I got back on my feet. It is in that difficult moment that I truly realized my life purpose — to help women find their zest for life, to start living ravenously in their full power and joy, despite what society requires from them. There is a truth to the saying “Happy Wife- Happy Life”. I will go even further and say, “happy women — happy planet”. So my goal is to bring back the spark into the eyes of my fellow femmes.

What is it about the work you’re doing that’s disruptive?

EVERYTHING! My middle name is a disruptor! I challenge women to start seeing themselves and their role in life in a differentway. To realize that their outer beauty and success are secondary to their inner joy, happiness and pleasure for life, aka their Joie de vivre.

I help women understand that their sexuality, creativity and spirituality — all have the same source and are all a great power that this world needs. Often society is afraid of this power

This happens all over the world, and has happened throughout history. For example, women who exuded sexual energy were often labeled as witches. They were condemned by the church, hated by other women, and shunned by men who felt threatened by them. This feminine power was considered a dark, evil force; multitudes of women who possessed it were burned and tortured in public demonstrations, undoubtedly teaching future generations of little girls to repress their sexual vibrancy. This fear of sexually powerful women exists because sexual energy is the most fundamental energy in human beings — in a sense, it’s the force of life itself. It is the wild, intuitive nature within us that does not submit to any laws or outside control. Female sexuality is not darkness; it is an endless source of light; yet, even today, society demands that we suppress this force and extinguish our own light

I help women find that wild power within themselves and make a commitment to fostering their power on a daily basis. I often say that happiness is not a feeling that just falls on our lap. It is a daily disciplined way of choosing activities and people that make you strong.

I have many activities that make me strong. For instance I teach Zumba, belly dance and yoga. I love archery, active and adventurous travel around the world, driving cars, throwing knives, shooting guns and jumping with a parachute.

We all need a little help along the journey — who have been some of your mentors? Can you share how they made an impact?

My grandmother, the greatest disruptor of all was an incredible doctor. She was such a great expert that even during Soviet times during the iron curtain — she was allowed to travel abroad to the Western countries. She always taught us that people are the same everywhere. That the majority of people want the same things- love, peace, family, freedom. She instilled in me love for life and great respect for a human soul and taught me how to be kind to them, as “everyone has their pain”.

My mother, another great disruptor, taught me how to live life on purpose. Despite the fact that as a single mom she had to work 3 jobs and spend long hours making a living, everything she did she did with passion. Even now after 45 yrs of being a University Professor, her eyes light up every time she talks about her students. She is constantly inventing new courses and creates programs that allow her students to blossom. I believe it is her contagious love for her work that did not let me settle just for any job, but encouraged me to connect with my passion and make a brave step of starting my own business.

Can you share 3 of the best words of advice you’ve gotten along your journey? Please give a story or example for each.

Sure! Here are three quotes of powerful disruptors that I use to guide my life.

#1 “Well-behaved women never make history” (Laurel Thatcher Ulrich). Society teaches us to be small, un-noticed and submissive. If we have an opinion, we are label all sorts of names and are shamed into silence. When a woman is silent she is not quiet. She is a volcano that is doomed to erupt. The fire of a resentful woman is destructive. However, when a woman is allowed to break the rules, to fulfill her purpose, to stand in her power and speak her truth her fire creates warmth that creates instead of destroying. It shapes the world, provides new opportunities and stimulates growth.

#2 If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be (Maya Angelou)

Most female clients who come to me are stuck in one or more area of their lives. The most dangerous emotion that blocks the majority of women is not fear, or anger or sorrow… it is .. SHAME.. this shame is the lowest vibration that is responsible for lethargic or depressive state of mind. This shame often originates from the feeling of not being like everyone else, of feeling inadequate. Yet, it is in those so-called inedequaties that one can find his or her most precious gifts. I always teach my students not to turn away from shame but dive right into it to find their biggest treasures.

#3 “Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself “ (Coco Chanel).

We, women, since our childhood are bombarded by society and media with images of beauty and we learn how to put ourselves down from early one. Have you ever heard a teenager talking about her body? I have when I was a high school teacher. It hurt me and scared me at the same time!

We, women, tend to be the worst critics of our own body. So if you feel bad about your legs, belly, breasts, arms — I hear you. I was there too and so are millions of other women. Unfortunately, it is a normal feeling for us females. It is interesting how our relationships with our bodies dictate our relationships with the partners and with the world. When we feel fit and sexy we are on top of the world and one with the world; but when our bodies feel unattractive to us we often create discord alienation and push partners, jobs, and opportunities away. However, no fillers or surgery can heal the wounded souls. The best remedy for that in my practice is finding your soul’s calling.

It is extremely difficult to have a high self-esteem and self-worth if you are not fulfilling your mission in life. On the contrary, if you know why you are here; if your life has a greater meaning and higher purpose, all enemies of self-esteem such as doubt, fear, self-criticism become mitigating. Even your not-so-perfect body (according to you) cannot interfere with your sense of fulfillment and joy that only living your passion and purpose can bring. When you live your life on a mission nothing can stop you and stand in your way… not even yourself!

Do you have a book/podcast/talk that’s had a deep impact on your thinking? Can you share a story with us?

Oh… you are in for a treat! My next book is coming on January 15, 2018. The name of the book is super disruptive and already got me in trouble (ha-ha). “Find the G-spot of Your Soul: How to Move from Lethargic to Ravenous Living”

In this book, I show you how to develop and harness your sexual energy to help you uncover and fulfill your life’s purpose — leaving behind your lethargic existence and experiencing a more playful and satisfying way of living your life. Combining extensive research and empirical data based on my work as a healing practitioner and fulfillment coach, I demonstrate that sexual energy, creative energy, and spiritual energy all come from the same place. I also provide you with a way to apply this principle, utilizing my unique, “diamond-shaped formula” to help people connect with (or reconnect with) their life purpose. Each point is illustrated with stories shared by my clients that readers can easily relate to. Hands-on activities and fun exercises follow each chapter, allowing readers to apply these ideas — to discover the meaning of their own lives, break away from the status quo, and start living RAVENOUSLY!.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂

Oh. We ARE creating a movement! A movement of joyful women who live ravenously. I am organizing a yearly women empowerment conference where we will recognize women not for their outer beauty or their achievements but for their thirst for life, for their ability to have Joie de vivre

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

My mom always shared the words of Omar Khayam with me: It is better to go hungry than eat whatever is just at hand; and it is better to be alone than to be with whoever happens to be there.

I believe that our immediate surroundings really shape our life experience. There was a time in my life where I had many friends… this was when I was broke and alone. Once I started standing in my power those so-called friends suddenly disappeared. I learned back then the true meaning of the saying that “misery likes the company”. Now I truly cherish those who are there for me not only in the time of the need but can openly celebrate my accomplishments. I surround myself with happy, positive people who bring in the best in me and want to see me succeed. That is the single magical strategy that you can use to change your life right away: disconnect from negative people who are feeding off your pain and value those who are there to celebrate you.

How can our readers follow you on social media?

Please visit my website: http://www.drmarinakostina.com

Like my FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Dr.MarinaKostina/

Join our FB group “G-zone”: https://bit.ly/2SuTMrw

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.marinakostina/

Youtube: https://bit.ly/2hsJOGS

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for joining us!

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