Community//

Do we love better when another loves us…

Or we love another better when we can ‘BE” Love? Love is quite expansive, exhilarating, all encompassing, makes our souls sing, spirit soar high, makes us reach the depth of our being, into the nectar of us, makes our fingers flow on the piano and brings a spring to our steps, breathe lighter and into […]


Or we love another better when we can ‘BE” Love?

Love is quite expansive, exhilarating, all encompassing, makes our souls sing, spirit soar high, makes us reach the depth of our being, into the nectar of us, makes our fingers flow on the piano and brings a spring to our steps, breathe lighter and into our core………Love makes us love more. Just that!

We know or feel love this way and in many more beautiful ways perhaps. So, we look for the people who make us feel that way, gather those things and memories which enable us to feel this expansive depth, and seek to take our physical bodies to beautiful places full of love vibrations. And there is glory and love in that.

And then sometimes, the gloominess and emptiness strike us out of nowhere. We cannot feel the love around us, within us. Nothing matters. Not the soothing voice of nature around us, not the beauty of things we gathered, not the presence of our beloved and the many loving hearts around us. Not the fond memories of moments gone by, not the delight that is staring at us in this present moment, nor do the possibilities of future soothe us. Our spirit is not ignited by what once promised to hold it high. Our souls yearn for more, more of what, we don’t know yet. The emptiness gnaws at us. And we scurry and rush into frantic search, to find what has gone missing. We rush to hold onto whatever and whoever seems to be the light of hope. The beloved, the comfort food, the hobby, the memory, the attachment, the familiar!

Yet, the yearning deepens….to feel the promise of innocence, that young heart’s hope of aliveness, the world of possibilities that we once felt. The love, the romance we experienced that was brought alive by the presence of another or many others. And yet now it completely alludes us!

We get angry, frustrated, hopeless, sad, and very fearful of our vulnerability, our loneliness, our breaking apart, our complete devastation, our not making sense, our utter desolateness that nothing or no one’s presence seem to comfort us. We ask: why?

So, our anger is projected onto the other(s) in our lives…the significant other(s). They are not enough. They are not doing enough. They don’t love us enough. They have walls, they are toxic, they are not fully alive. Why else will we feel this way?

Sounds like your journey too? Well, this is the soul’s journeying deep into its own vastness.

This is our eternal quest, the connection we lost in the cacophony of our modern day lives. It is bound to happen at some point, it is signalling us to connect us to our core. I know it because I traveled that path too and continue to, and witness it in many around me, increasing in leaps and bounds.

Everyone is breaking apart. Everyone is searching for their core within. How deep does it go, what lies beyond, what brings us that alluding eternal peace, where lies the sense of bliss that is not dependent on the external chaos, what continuously feeds us the stream of love in our heart space that promises to never leave us or dim with time, where will be able to feel safe?

And we delve within. We know immediately or we take our sweet time. Consciousness rising is not a new age phenomenon. It has always been our instinctual legacy that was more abundantly available to our ancestors when times were quieter, when Mother nature was mainstream in our daily lives and guided with her inherent wisdom, when we were less afraid to be close to the natural laws and did not strive to be better, bigger and faster incessantly. When we dared to pause, listen, rest and re-start when we felt aligned naturally.

In our times of modernization and mechanization, we have developed the love for mass impact and scaling-up of every phenomenon we come across, we love labeling and analyzing because we feel comfortable in the security of our mind’s understanding. Because when we understand, we feel we can be safe to control it. But is understanding a process or a thing or someone truly about controlling the magnanimity of the millions of micro-processes, environmental situations and complexity of another’s essence that has led to the manifested result we seem to have understood?

In our times, we feel fearful to pause, to feel our individual discomfort. We are afraid to be our individual self, rather belong to be safe. We are fearful of the small, the ordinary, the routine. We feel we will fail if we pause, if we dared to slow we will have to work doubly hard to catch up when others have raced forward. Why would we have “to work doubly hard”, as I often hear many lament? If it is a passion in our hearts and our spirits are ignited with it, is it not our unique destiny? We just need to listen. We just need to know that it is our innate nature to co-create our unique path because there is no other natural law truer than this.

When we are being fearful of not finding our purpose, our life paths, our destiny, or worry that our truest dreams that we so deeply love would somehow not come true — we are reinforcing our lack of trust in the flow of Chi, the universal life force, the Big Design, the Universe as the Creator. Our intellect alone, bereft of the richness of our intuition can create smallness in us in the form of fear, doubt, anxiety, worries and self-sabotage. We thereby, doubt our own free-will and true strength that we are co-creators with the flow of life, and with others, in perfect harmony.

The more efficient way to head back to that center of harmony, to the peace we seek, the love we yearn for, then, is NOT through the promise of another’s presence, or the gathering of experiences and things that would mirror that love and peace. What is it then?

It is through an undeniable faith that we will know our true essence, our true desires, our life purpose and life paths when we learn to listen deeply to ourselves. When we learn that life is not turning against us even when we are faced with dead ends with what once felt familiar, comforting and promised to bring us love and peace. It is, perhaps at best, universe’s way to support our journey within because we got too busy otherwise. We then, pause to re-learn to surrender and take surrendered actions, to bring a greater balance of our intellect and intuition into our decision-making and actions, and to truly believe that each one of us is a unique flower with a beautiful fragrance.

That we will bloom according to that greater Intelligence that holds us all and has a place for each one of us. That ….

….. we are loved for just being!

….. we love others because they just are!

…… we are not in competition with anyone else!

…… each one has an absolute right to protect their fragrance and the process of flowering and just ‘Be’!

…… when we feel love and ‘Become’ love, we love others better, not the other way around!

As children, we bathed in this essence. I see that abundant in my child each day and remember that I too, once carried the same openness, curiosity and receptivity to life and now re-awakened to love’s infinite possibilities!

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres. We publish pieces written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Learn more or join us as a community member!
Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...

Community//

Let’s Get Intimate: “Why the best self love and healing comes from relentless inquiry” With Laura Di Franco & Sasza Lohrey

by Sasza Lohrey
Well-Being//

Addressing The Real Problem

by Maxine Harley (MSc)

Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter

Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy.

Thrive Global
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.