Wisdom//

Decisions I Break

And why I feel okay about it.


In a world where women (especially the ones holding higher positions at work) are expected to take/ make decisions at the drop of a hat, I am happy to break a few.

As the Marketing Head at one of India’s leading eLearning companies, I go through a number of decision-making opportunities day in and day out. Some pertain to marketing automation software systems — their evaluation and selection, some deal in the realm of Search Engine Marketing (SEM), some to do with Advertising vehicles to invest in, and others that can be broadly classified under ‘routine or low impact’.

But here’s a confession — there are a number of decisions I ‘break’ every single day; without anyone’s knowledge, without documentation, without permission. And that’s not even the shocking bit.

Here’s what makes it unbelievable; almost outrageous.

I get away with it. Unabashedly. Unapologetically.

Because somehow it seems right; I can make peace with myself and find happiness.

You see, along with playing the role of a Marketing Head, I am a full-time mother to a 3-year young bundle of energy who doesn’t give damn to what mumma does, her responsibilities at work or otherwise, as long as she is there for him. And I don’t blame him. He’s just being what he is supposed to be-a kid.

Indra Nooyi, the reigning CEO of Pepsico since 2006, hits the nail on its head when she says, “Women can’t have it all…they pretend to have it all”. This, right here, is truth in all its glory.

We, women, are multi-taskers; there’s nothing like finishing a chore and then getting to another. Not in a woman’s world. Not now, not in the near future. It’s an ability that’s innate in every single one of us; sometimes in a dormant stage. And motherhood flicks on that switch with a unprecedented precision that, oftentimes, it scares us; makes us re-evaluate our worth as mothers, as wives, as daughters and other manifestations of our relationship in this worldly world.

We go along living our lives, putting our kids’ and spouses’ needs ahead of ours. Snacking on leftovers from our kids’ meals, and gulping down our egos and pride. Bowing down to tie the kids’ shoe laces, and standing up for our existence. Singing lullabies to ease our kids into beautiful dreams, while having ours stifled with thoughts and to-dos.

And that’s not bad at all!

For most of us, we have chosen this path, this way of life. And in it we find contentment. That very factor that keeps us going; from one task to another, from one day to the next, from one goodnight kiss to “I love you, mumma”.

So, in a world where women, especially the ones holding higher positions at work, are expected to take/ make decisions at the drop of a hat, I am happy to break a few.

…the decision to go to official dinner parties because that would mean having my kid being fed by someone else when I would rather be enjoying moments of solitude after a hard day at work.

…the decision to go out with my girlfriends after work because that would mean having my kid watch TV when I would rather be with him at the playground.

…the decision to snooze the alarm and sleep in for those few extra seconds because that would mean checking-in later to office and returning home late.

…the decision to have the grandparents foster my kid, but rather raise my kid on the principles my husband and I believe in.

Originally published at medium.com

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