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Dealing with Mental Health

A personal experience and thoughts when it comes to Mental Health

Today is Mental Health awareness day. You may ask why write on something like Mental health, but instead you should ask why not. Mental health issues affect many people, approximately 40 million people and that is the diagnosed number. I am sure there are many more that are not diagnosed. There is also a lack of access to mental health care. This comes from the lack of providers and for many people the lack of affordability of this care.

The stigma of mental health also deters people from getting the needed care. For many people we are raised that those who have mental health issues are making it up or they are weak. We are taught to suck it up and to get over it. Some people with mental health issues function fairly normal and people wouldn't even realize they suffer from issues unless they talk about it. Other people are not able to live a regular life due to those mental health issues. Many people with mental health issues also have a co-occurring substance abuse addiction. There are even medical providers who really do not understand how to deal with some of the mental health issues.

I myself suffer from mental health issues. I was originally diagnosed with situational depression 13 years ago. I was on medication for a few months and then seemed to be better so I was taken off those meds. I think I was fine for a while. I can't say what defining factor happened but about 8 years ago my depression came back but I did not go to my doctor, I did not face up to what I was going through. I became suicidal and had a plan to kill myself. Obviously I did not commit suicide but that is a different story.

But I still did not go to the doctor and deal with it the right way. I hid it and pushed on with the thought I couldn't admit how bad off I was. I was having anxiety/panic attacks on a regular basis. My depression was in control but I hid it, I still got up worked and took care of my kids. Then 4 1/2 years ago I met my now husband, he has a son who has huge mental health issues. In dealing with him my issues got worse and I still was not sure how to deal with it. I did finally go to the doctor and got put on depression meds, I still didn't admit to the anxiety or suicidal thoughts I was still having. With all of this I couldn't sleep to save me so I tried any OTC sleep meds I could think of, I still suffer from insomnia and deal with trying medication to help me sleep which most take about 2 hours to kick in, but if I don't take them it takes a lot longer to fall asleep. In the last year I have went to the doctor and admitted how bad I am doing, it is still a daily struggle.

I deal with depression, anxiety/panic attacks daily, and even though I am not officially diagnosed with bipolar I do show some of the symptoms of it. Honestly I haven't went to the doctor admittedly. But honestly most of the symptoms I show towards bipolar occurs close to the time of menstrual cycle (I know overshare) which could be Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD). I don't know if I do and honestly just recently started researching what I have been going through and I seem to have many of those symptoms. But I will be tracking my symptoms since I read about this and found a tracker for it. I will also be talking to my doctor. I am tired of feeling like this and I know that there are things I can do to help myself.

I deal with depression, anxiety/panic attacks daily, and even though I am not officially diagnosed with bipolar I do show some of the symptoms of it. Honestly I haven't went to the doctor admittedly. But honestly most of the symptoms I show towards bipolar occurs close to the time of menstrual cycle (I know overshare) which could be Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD). I don't know if I do and honestly just recently started researching what I have been going through and I seem to have many of those symptoms. But I will be tracking my symptoms since I read about this and found a tracker for it. I will also be talking to my doctor. I am tired of feeling like this and I know that there are things I can do to help myself.

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