March 4th is the only day of the year that is a full sentence. (Get it? March forth.) Therefore, I would like to declare 3/4 to be a new holiday, which I am calling “Click It Day.” To honor this day, choose something you are ready to let go of (an old grudge, an outdated belief, an unhelpful attitude) and then on March 4th, declare that you are ready to March Forth into a new chapter of your beautiful life.
While you’re deciding what you want to let go of on March 4th, here’s a little story about how I learned the value of clicking it:
After my relationship of nearly two decades ended, I asked my father how he managed to find happiness again after my mother left him, back when I was a teen. “I clicked it, kid,” he said. “Then I just moved forward.”
“You clicked it?” I asked.
My father came of age in the 1950s and still carries himself like the Naval lieutenant he once was. He’s a man of the “big boys don’t cry era.” So, it wasn’t surprising when he explained in his typically terse manner, “You just decide to move ahead and not look back. You ‘click it’,” he repeated, as if this were an obvious solution.
“Click it” seemed to mean I should stuff my emotions and paste a happy smile over my broken heart. So, at first I wrote off my father’s advice. If I needed help balancing my budget or deciding when it was time to buy or sell a house, he was the man to turn to. But I scolded myself for thinking he could help me sort out matters of the heart.
But then, five years later, and after countless therapy sessions and even more hours spent crying on the shoulders of well-meaning friends–not to mention exhausting my ample supply of self-help books, I finally decided it was time to consider my father’s advice.
I had mourned enough. By now feeling had turned into wallowing. My emotions were no longer in motion. In short, I was stuck. Nothing else was helping so why not try to click it?On March 4th of that year I vowed to “march forth” into a new chapter. I enlisted the support of my friends and my therapist. I explained that I wanted their support in helping me to let go of the past and look forward to the future.
Beginning on March 4th of that year, if someone asked about my love life, instead of telling a sorrowful story about my break up, I’d say, “I have a life filled with love from family and friends.” If I found myself longing for my past relationship, I’d think instead about future possibilities, or better yet, I’d bring myself into the present moment with a few mindful breaths.
Once I “clicked it” I focused on what I did have: a loving daughter, a close-knit extended family, a great job, and more. I even began to fall in love with the solitude of living by myself.
Part fake it till you make it, part breaking old habits of seeing the glass half empty, I discovered that click it, when the time is ripe, really could be healing, healthy, and helpful.
Ever since, I’ve declared March 4th to be “Click it Day.” Each year I choose another old grievance or tired story to retire on that day. If there’s something I find myself talking negatively about: My age, my appearance, my career, or the state of some relationship, I click it and replace the old toxic belief with a new way of being and thinking.