I was talking with a friend recently, telling her about how I’m not very good at making decisions, when she asked, “What is the payoff for believing that thought?”
The payoff was that I don’t really have to try. After all, I’m not very good at it anyway. By believing I’m not very good at making decisions, I get to dither. I get to berate myself about past decisions.
I get to blame my nature, rather than take responsibility.
I don’t have to change. I get to take the easy way out.
But as fate would have it, the easy way out isn’t easy. It means I waste a lot of time. I procrastinate. I go around the problem instead of through it.
That simple question helped me see beyond my self-defeating thoughts and begin to make a change.
It’s amazing what a good question will do.
I go back to that question many times a day now. It helps me cut through the bullshit rattling around in my head. It helps me see past my excuses. It helps me make decisions with less angst. It helps me see more clearly.
Not being good at making decisions is one my beliefs that gets in my way. I have others too. Perhaps you also have a belief or two (or, like me, more) that stand in your way…
- I’m too… fat, old, young, busy, fearful
- I don’t have enough… time, money, education, focus
- I’m waiting for… the right time, idea, person, opportunity, connection, permission
Now just imagine what might happen if you asked yourself this one simple question, “What is the payoff for believing that thought?”
Originally published at lisaculhane.com