Burning Bridges

Do you strike that match or not?

Photo courtesy of Brage Neslein, Unsplash.com

You’ve probably heard it said many times, “Never burn a bridge. You may need to cross over it again.”

We all have those bridges that we struggle with. Those bridges that lead to upset or even nowhere, but yet we can’t seem to strike a match.

We can’t because we feel bad. We can’t because we second-guess our own gut instincts. We can’t because we’re afraid of the consequences. What if we need to cross that bridge again? What if we regret burning it later?

“Stop telling me not to burn bridges. Some bridges are meant to be burned; some roads are never meant to be traveled again.”
― Steve Maraboli

Does that quote hit you like a sucker punch to the gut? Does fear rise up in your chest until it stops in your throat cutting off your air supply? Or does it empower you, giving you the courage to set some bridges ablaze?


I’ve been thinking about this topic quite a bit lately, as I’ve watched someone I know burn some major bridges. Bridges that they’re trying to cross again but can’t because they’re not there anymore.

It made me think about the bridges I’ve burned, for example, bridges to toxic relationships. They were bridges that lasted far longer than they should have. And hindsight being what it is, I’m not even sure why I took so damned long to strike the match…because once I did I was relieved. (Pretty telling, huh?)

I think that’s the hardest part to burning any bridge is actually making the decision to do so.


If you struggle with bridge burning, please do yourself a huge favor and consider the cost of keeping that bridge open for travel.

What is it costing you?
Is it costing you your heart, your self-confidence, your well-being, your energy?
Does the cost out weight what you receive in return?
What will you gain if you burn the bridge?

I wish someone had asked me those questions when I was agonizing over some of my bridges. I also wish someone had said this to me;

“Value you enough and trust that you will make the right decision.”

My friends, I say that to you.

If there are bridges in your life that are leading to nowhere…Bridges that are costing you a great deal to travel on… value you enough and trust that you will make the right decision.

I know it’s scary so please know that you’re not alone. I am here, ready and able to support.

The reality is, there are some bridges that need to be set on fire, never to be crossed again. And while it may not be easy, in the long run burning ones that lead to pain and upset creates space for new bridges to be built…bridges that lead to more positive places and people.

Just know that I’m sending much love and light, as always…

Originally published at www.whatswithinu.com.

Originally published at medium.com

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