“You’ll never make it without me!” He said.
I was 27, broke, and broken. I had no idea how I was going to survive on my own, but I knew I was killing my spirit by staying in the emotionally, psychologically, and at times physically abusive relationship.
He had done everything over the course of five years to gain control over me and break down my spirit. He called me names, belittled me, and made me feel that I could not make it on my own. That the reason why I had everything was because of him. That without him I was nothing. He inserted himself in the business I created and took over the finances. The abuse continued and I often would fantasize about leaving, but never actually left. Until one day, I had had enough. Realizing he would never change and that I deserved to live a life full of freedom, I made a plan. And each day I took inspired action steps so that I could leave.
It took me almost year, but finally one day when he was out, I packed up everything and left. It was not over though. Since he had some control in the business I had started five years prior, he took me to court and he won the right to be owner of the website I had worked so hard to build. The website that was number one in google searches. The website that provided me with my income.
When I lost my website I felt immense anger, fear, and sadness. How will I make it? How will I build everything again? But, I remembered a verse from my favourite poem, “Do it Anyway,” by Mother Teresa. The verse says “What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.”
And so I built again anyway. I started from ground zero and took inspired action steps every day. Eventually I had built up a new company. All on my own. With no one taking the finances from it. And with no one to belittle me and mistreat me when I arrived home. It was successful and served many people in helping to fulfil their dreams.
When you are in a bad situation, it feels so awful and that it is never going to get better. What I know for sure is that if you take the leap and push away all your fears and doubts, you are going to be okay. Build anyway.
Thank you for reading.
In Love and Light,
Jaclyn Marie
Creator of Living in the Zing