First of all, take care of yourself, mentally, emotionally and physically. It’s all too easy to neglect your health after an emotional blow like a breakup, but that’s the last thing you should do. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, exercise and nutrition. That may mean turning to supplements like the Thrive patch if you don’t have the energy to take care of yourself, but be careful. Not all supplements are good for you, and you don’t want to develop a dependency. The main thing is to keep looking after yourself, even when it’s hard and you don’t feel like doing it. Maybe you don’t feel like cooking a nutritious meal, but you still deserve a nutritious meal, more than ever in fact. That said, you may find it hard to do this all on your own, and that is why it’s a good idea to seek support.
Support is vital for getting through a breakup. Support from friends and family helps you remember that you have a social network beyond your previous partner. You’re not as alone as you think you are, and there are many people who can help you through this. If you feel like your emotional baggage is too heavy to put on your friends and family, that’s exactly what mental health professionals are for. If you weren’t already monitoring your mental health, you definitely should now. There are many benefits to finding a psychologist or psychiatrist to talk to at a difficult time like this. They are trained professionals and can advise you on the best strategies to use.
It’s tempting to make big changes right away, but that isn’t always a good idea. There are a few life changes that you may be considering, but it’s probably not a good idea to dive in just yet. For example, you definitely don’t want to dive right into your next relationship. Live with yourself for a while and find stability before you move on. It may also be tempting to completely change your life and career by, say, quitting your job and leaving the country. Leaving the country would probably take you away from your existing support network, and quitting your job may be a decision you regret later. Better to wait on handing in your notice straight away, unless you work somewhere that you’re going to see your ex every single day.
That said, there are some changes that are well worth considering. Small ones to shake yourself up and reset your brain. Perhaps it’s a good time to pick up a new hobby or start exercising. You may want to get a haircut or make some other stylistic change. It may even be a good idea to move, just as long as you’re not moving away from your support network. If you’re living in an apartment that you used to share with your partner, however, it may be best to move out sooner rather than later. You do want a fresh start, after all.
Just don’t push yourself too hard too fast. You need time to recover from this. Recognize that there’s a fine line between wallowing and overexerting yourself, and it’s different for everyone at different times. Don’t compare yourself to someone else’s timeline. Don’t even compare this breakup to previous breakups you’ve endured. There is no timeline for this, unfortunately.
Most of all, be kind to yourself. Now is not the time to be critical and beat yourself up about all the things you imagine you did wrong. You are not an impartial observer right now. You can’t grow if you’re still healing.