The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life. ~Muhammad Ali
There comes a time in life where an evaluation is due. You might look back at the years past and reflect on what would have happened if you took a different path. It sounds like a worthy yet futile exercise. You will never know the turn of events in the future had you made a different choice or taken a different path.
You do have a choice however. Your life is a series of choices. You need to be aware of the choices you make and the consequences they have on you. Inaction is also a choice. Think of your past choices and the impact they had on you. Let them inform you, look for patterns and learn from them. They might change the way you look at your future.
You don’t have to get stuck in the past. You don’t have to wait for something to happen. And you are not broken. You are Naturally Creative, Resourceful and Whole. That is one of the Co-Active Model cornerstones: People are Naturally Creative, Resourceful and Whole.
As I continue to become a better coach, I find coaching to be more like offering someone a flashlight. A flashlight to help you become a better you. A flashlight to help you become the person you want to be rather than dwell on the person you could have become. A flashlight to help you tap into your potential. A flashlight to help you mine for the gold within you.
Gradually, transformation happens when you are willing.But again, that’s a choice. Your choice and it’s never too late to make a different choice.
One of the best analogies I came across was the idea of sliding door moments (from the movie Sliding Doors) introduced by Dr. John Gottman. In the movie, Helen Quilley (played by Gwyneth Paltrow) had a choice when the train stopped and the sliding doors opened. The movie takes the viewers on two separate paths to show what her life would have been like if she chose to get on the train and what it would have been like if she didn’t.
Your sliding door moment could be today. It could be now. It could be something you do every day. Again, it is about the choices we make daily. So, are you going to take the opportunity to get on this journey of becoming a better you? Or are you just going to settle for the way things are? Steve Jobs has the answer to this question, “Keep Looking and Don’t Settle!”
Keep looking for ways to becoming a better you!
In The Flash series, there is a scene with Barry Allen (The Flash) and his older counterpart from a different earth (Earth three). As The Flash was considering running back to the past to change the way his life turned out (apparently he could do that), his older counterpart who is more experienced and much wiser tells him, “The question you need to ask yourself is: What kind of hero you gonna be? Are you just gonna take a do over every time you make a mistake or will you live with them and move forward?”
Imagine you take the flashlight and use it to look, discover and explore. What do you want to look for, discover and explore? YOU are using it to look, discover and explore yourself. That needs a lot of courage, curiosity and self compassion.
Carl Jung said, “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious. . . . This procedure, however, is disagreeable and therefore not very popular.”
In flashlight, I offer you tools to help you become courageously curious with a twist of play. These tools will help you become more conscious by evaluating where you are now, where you want to be, where do you want to look, discover and explore and who do you want to become as well as ways help you get there. This is about becoming a better YOU not telling you exactly what to do.
I invite you to turn on your flashlight and find the courage that lies within you in becoming a better YOU! 🔦