Community//

Because, I’m an Addict

What a difference a few days can make...

What a difference a few days can make.

For the last few weeks, I’ve lacked energy. I’ve been lazy and found it hard to focus. I spent hours parked up at beautiful beaches reading my book or just doing nothing instead of going for walks to explore the area like I usually would. I spent a windy afternoon drinking coffee and chatting to people instead of pumping up my kites and having fun out on the water.

I hadn’t seen the sunrise in weeks.

I didn’t write much for weeks. I lacked motivation and inspiration.

I kept thinking I need to think about the future, make a plan for the year, but I simply couldn’t. I couldn’t see clearly, couldn’t think straight. I often felt like the answers are almost there but hidden by this fog in my head.

For weeks, I haven’t felt good about myself. Haven’t felt proud of who I am or what I’ve achieved. I would go to sleep at night feeling disappointed with my day. I would wake up in the morning wishing that I could just stay in bed all day.

I lacked energy, even for those things I usually love doing.

But this past week has been different.

I’ve been super productive. I’ve been motivated, inspired and excited. One day, I spent eight hours working, feeling focused the whole time. And then I did some more work after dinner. Not because I had to, but because I felt energised and inspired.

I’ve achieved more in the last four days than I did in the four weeks before this one. Most of it not because I had to, but because I wanted to.

I’ve been active, doing some exercise every day. Not because I had to, but because I wanted to. I wanted to be out and about. I wanted to be active.

A couple of days ago I sat down and thought about my future and my plans for the next year. I was focused and could see the options clearly. The fog that’s been in my head for weeks just lifted. I still don’t know the answers, but at least I know the options. I know what my goals and dreams are and what I would have to do to achieve each one.

I’ve been up before sunrise every day this week.

I’ve been inspired to write almost every day.

I’ve been feeling good about myself. Really good. I’ve gone to bed at night feeling proud of what I have achieved that day. I’ve woken up in the morning feeling positive and excited about the day ahead, knowing that I have the energy and motivation to make the most of it.

This is who I want to be!

The person I’ve been this week is who I want to be. Every day. For the rest of my life.

And I know I can. I know I can be this person every day.

Because I know what the difference is between this week and the last four. I know what the secret is to being this person every day. All I have to do it eat well. All I have to do is stay away from sugar and refined carbs. That easy! And yet so hard!

I’ve been through this cycle many times before. I know I feel so much better when I eat well. I know I’m so much more motivated, more active, more inspired and overall happier when I don’t eat sugar and refined carbs. This wasn’t the first time that I experienced that magical change inside of me after cutting out sugar again, after weeks of letting the evil white stuff get the better of me.

I know the secret to being the best and happiest version of myself. It’s simple: Stay away from sugar!

And yet I keep falling off the wagon. I keep repeating the same cycle over and over again. I Eat well for weeks, sometimes even months, until I make one little exception. That one little exception then turns into a whole day of eating junk food (because if I do it, I might as well go all the way), which then turns into weeks of eating unhealthy food, weeks of lacking energy and feeling unfocused and disappointed in myself. Until I somehow manage to pull the emergency brakes and get back on the ‘sugar-free’ wagon.

I guess it is a good thing that, these days, I always manage to pull the brakes before it’s too late. But what if, at some point, I miss that moment? Because it’s not like that hasn’t happened before. I might have been able to get back on track in time for the past 7 years, but before that, it was a very different story. And I never want to be that person again!

And why do I even do it in the first place? Why do I let myself go down the slippery sugary slope over and over again when I know I’ll feel so much worse for it?

Why is it that even though I know from years of experience that eating well makes me feel happy and good about myself, I can’t seem to be able to resist the temptation of sugar for more than a few weeks at a time?

Because I’m an addict. And sugar is my drug!

About the Author

Lisa Jansen is a writer and blogger. She writes a blog about finding happiness and following your heart, living full-time in a campervan and what it is like when you decide not to follow the traditional path in life. Visit www.lifedonedifferently.com to check it out.

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