To support others that are feeling anxious, we must be empathetic. Let’s face it, NO ONE has done this before. We are all in uncharted waters and all feelings are valid. There is no “right way” to feel right now. We must let others express their fears and worries and hold space for them without judgment. The feelings of fear and worry are real!
As a part of my series about “How To Develop Mindfulness And Serenity During Stressful Or Uncertain Times”, I had the pleasure of interviewing Kelly Kristin.
Kelly Kristin is an Amazon Best Selling Author, life coach, renowned healer, and creator of the Rapid Transformation Process. She is a subconscious mind expert and is a clinical hypnotherapist, NLP practitioner and Psych-K facilitator. She has a special interest in the mind-body connection and healing root cause trauma. She works with others to clear issues from the root cause, reconnect to their power and reprogram their minds for success.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?
That to me is always such a loaded question! I took a lot of different roads to the work that I do today. In short, I became ill in my late twenties with autoimmune disorders and other issues that doctors told me there was no cure for. At the time I was a registered nurse (RN) and I knew I didn’t want to take the western medicine route. I refused to take that for an answer and began my own healing journey. First, I took a deep dive into holistic health and became a Health Coach through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN). From there, I knew that I had to go further to not only be able to heal myself but help others with what I had learned. I became obsessed with neurobiology the inner workings of the human mind, body and soul connection. I have studied many different modalities and healing processes to eventually create my own process of healing and transformation known as the Rapid Transformation Process. I was and still am determined to use all of my life experience as a force for good and transformation for others.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?
The most interesting thing has been the evolution. I never intended to be doing the work that I am today, I just kept following the little voices inside of me telling me to take a certain course or training or to move across the country. Life really starts to open up when you focus on being.
Is there a particular book that made a significant impact on you? Can you share a story or explain why it resonated with you so much?
The book that really started a revolution for me and helped me to understand my own power and why my life looked the way it did, was the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. At the time I had no concept of what being in the now meant and how I was still carrying my past with me everywhere I went. The teachings in this book really helped me understand the importance of my mind, energy and emotions.
Ok, thank you for all that. Now let’s move to the main focus of our interview. From your experience or research, how would you define and describe the state of being mindful?
Being mindful is about being present to what is present within you. That includes your thoughts, feelings and physical sensations in the body. It is about being in the moment of now instead of living in the known past and predictable future.
This might be intuitive to you, but it will be instructive to spell this out. Can you share with our readers a few of the physical, mental, and emotional benefits of becoming mindful?
When you become mindful, your entire life changes. You become aware of your thoughts, feelings and actions and have much more control over how you feel and show up in the world. Emotionally, you are able to understand yourself at a deeper level as you begin to question where your feelings are arising from. You are able to let go of the past and the hold it can have on you and live in the present where possibility lies. You are able to observe your thoughts instead of believing every thought that you think. As you become more mindful you feel at peace, your stress levels go down and your resiliency goes up. You are able to handle life in a new way, because as you change, everything changes.
Ok. Here is the main question of our discussion. The past 5 years have been filled with upheaval and political uncertainty. Many people have become anxious from the dramatic jolts of the news cycle. The fears related to the coronavirus pandemic have only heightened a sense of uncertainty, anxiety, fear, and loneliness. From your experience or research what are five steps that each of us can take to develop mindfulness and serenity during such uncertain times? Can you please share a story or example for each.
Yes, times are crazy right now as we are in uncertain territory, but as I like to say it is in the uncertainty where ANYTHING is possible. With that being said, getting your mind right is the most important step to breaking out of the anxiety and fear cycle.
Here are 5 steps that you can take at any time to get out of anxiety and fear:
- Become aware of your thoughts and feelings
- Connect back to the now moment
- Change your focus
- Choose a new thought
- Repeat as often as necessary
Let’s see how this works in action.
You notice that you are feeling anxious and fearful. Take a moment to slow down and go within, either through meditation or simply begin to observe your thoughts. Become aware of what thoughts you are actually thinking that are causes these feelings of unease. It is important to allow yourself to feel your feeling completely, don’t try to deny them just feel them.
After becoming aware of your current thoughts, connect back to the truth of the now moment. What is actually happening right now? Are you safe? Are you secure? Do you have the things that you need? If you are anxious and fearful you are most likely focusing on a negative future and creating negative scenarios in your mind. These things do not currently exist and coming back to the now will help you release the future worry you have been living in.
As I mentioned earlier, it is in the uncertainty where anything is possible, but you will get what you focus on so this next step is extremely important. You must change your focus from a negative future to a positive one. What future do you WANT to create? If anything could be possible, what would you want to have happened in your life?
Now when you decide what you want to create and the kind of future that you would like to be living in, you choose new thoughts that align with that future. Ask yourself if you were already experiencing what you desire, what are your thoughts then? How can you be that version of you starting now? Think those thoughts and feel those feelings now.
Now that you know this process, you repeat it as often as necessary. You can do this with any thought or feeling that arises. Be gentle with yourself through this process and give yourself grace. We are all doing the best that we can!
From your experience or research what are five steps that each of us can take to effectively offer support to those around us who are feeling anxious? Can you explain?
To support others that are feeling anxious, we must be empathetic. Let’s face it, NO ONE has done this before. We are all in uncharted waters and all feelings are valid. There is no “right way” to feel right now. We must let others express their fears and worries and hold space for them without judgment. The feelings of fear and worry are real! We can also be the light and hold ourselves at a higher vibration to invite others to meet us there. We take care of others by first taking care of ourselves. You cannot pour from an empty cup, so do your own work like the process above to make sure you are in a good space before offering to help or be there for anyone.
Once you are in a good place you must be asking the right questions. How can I support you? What do you need right now to feel peace? Support others through love, encouragement and being a genuine source of positivity. The truth is that this too shall pass, and the more we can get everyone on board with the idea that we get to create a future of our choosing, the better off we will all be.
What are the best resources you would suggest for someone to learn how to be more mindful and serene in their everyday life?
I really don’t think anything beats meditation for being more mindful and finding that peace within yourself. I am a huge fan of hypnosis as it helps to quickly get into the subconscious mind and create lasting change. I have a hypnotic meditation that I created specifically for this time of uncertainty, it is designed to take you out of anxiety and pull back in your personal power. You can download it here: https://www.kellykristintraining.com/anxiety
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Do you have a story about how that was relevant in your life?
“Leave the situation or accept it, all else is madness” — Eckhart Tolle
I remember as I was listening to Tolle’s book on audio and rewinding so I could hear him say this over and over again. I was on the brink of leaving a very toxic relationship that I had been complaining about for years, and in that moment it became clear to me that I was mad. I frequently go back to this quote every time I am complaining or feeling a lack of acceptance in my life.
You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
I have started a movement! It is Woman Unleashed, and my mission is to have every woman know her worth, speak her truth, set her standards and refuse to settle so that she can live life in full expression. I am here to stop women from being silent when they want to speak, settling less for they deserve and not having the confidence to be who they truly are!
What is the best way our readers can follow you online?
My website ishttp://kellykristin.co
Thank you for these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!