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At the heart of it!

This year, the retailers were in a haste to pack away all their Christmas decorations and shelves of goods, and displays of their subtle and not so subtle manipulation to buy gifts. There has been no break from the ever-present retailer nightmare for customers, or shall we say consumers. Within the same day, the next […]

This year, the retailers were in a haste to pack away all their Christmas decorations and shelves of goods, and displays of their subtle and not so subtle manipulation to buy gifts.
There has been no break from the ever-present retailer nightmare for customers, or shall we say consumers.
Within the same day, the next money-making racket had started, and it is now in the name of Valentine’s Day.

If the annoyance of months of Christmas eye-sores wasn’t enough, now comes the illusion of buying gifts and things for love.
The misconception that love is bought and measured by material objects. The message is strong that you must be ‘in love’, have someone special, and buy the retailers merchandise, so that you make someone feel loved and special. The bigger or more expensive the gift, the greater your love. Really?
The message is terribly loud to show how much you love your special person, by going all out in purchases, dinners and creating the perfect day.
The retailers created this marketing ploy and the world obeyed by buying into it. Without questioning or refusing to partake in it, most humans followed like sheep since ‘it was the accepted norm’. They wanted to fit in, do the supposed right thing and adhere to the status quo.

I remember at the age of twelve years old, wondering who may send me a secret card or message, to declare their love for me. How many cards would I receive, and then compare with others as to who was the most popular. Even at that age, we were conditioned to believe that our value and worth was measured by how many cards, letters and chocolates we received. The quantity received, showed us and those around us, how important and special we were. At that age it was the highlight of the year and one in which you could assess how many secret admirers you had. For me personally, the novelty of Valentine’s Day stopped there. From there it was a formality and expectation that had to be adhered to or all hell broke loose.

It belonged to the teenage years of infatuation and illusion. It wasn’t meant to be another excuse to fill the empty void of life with more materialism, and definitely not in the name of love.
Love is not based on external factors and what others do for you or give you, but how you see and give to yourself first.

There is no one LOVE Day, as every day is a day to love yourself and generously give love and kindness to others too, as love flows out of you. Not in the form of gifts and cards, but in the way you behave, act toward and treat others. And not for one day, but over the entire year.

Are you reliant on finding an ideal partner, falling in love and getting treated superbly on Valentine’s Day?
If so, you will be setting yourself up for a lot of pain and then resentment. The retailers brainwash you to believe that love is bought and relies on material objects. Big Christmases, New Years and Valentines Days were solely created to make money out of you. Retailers want money, and they are fabulous at creating ways to suck all the money they can out of their consumers. They are well trained in making you buy what you don’t need, by pulling your emotional strings, making you believe you need more and you don’t have enough, that material objects will bring you happiness and prove your self-worth. You then sit with excesses, emptiness and a depleted credit card.

Instant gratification is all you are feeding, and once the object has lost its appeal or the occasion has passed, then your momentary happiness lapses and you return to the need for the next fix.
We are so conditioned from childhood with all society’s rules and expectations, that most just eventually ‘tow the line’ so as not to stand out and look like a misfit or rebel. People pleasing and being part of the ‘tribe of sheep’.

What does every human want more than anything? To belong, to be loved, accepted, valued and acknowledged.
The truth is, that no-one else or nothing outside of yourself, can fulfill you. That is purely your responsibility.
But due to human conditioning, you have been taught otherwise and it is for your own well-being and sanity, that you undo this and reprogram yourself with the truth.

The first step, is finding unconditional love for yourself through all the layers of brain washing you have accumulated and accepted. You need to find out truly who you are, your ‘realness’ and then love yourself, warts, scars, blemishes, dents and all. You were not born to be perfect, but real. If you get this, then you have released yourself from a prison most never escape.
Once you fall in love with and accept yourself unconditionally, you become so attractive, that others are drawn to be around you. No more searching, convincing or pleading!

Love does not exist outside of yourself, but it is an inside job. You and only you can find and hold onto it. It is a decision you make and commit to, that you will dig deep within, even though it is dark, scary, messy and uncomfortable. But you will emerge way stronger, empowered and in love with you. That is the best Valentine’s Day message ever!

I am running a Valentine’s Day event ‘LOVE YOU 1st, from 13 to 14 February.
You can find me here:
www.lucindaharman.com
www.facebook.com/lucindaharman

Here you will learn:
How to master unconditional love
How to fall in love with yourself
How to break through the Valentine’s Day conditioning and perception so you can celebrate yourself.

I cannot wait to help YOU LOVE YOU 1st!

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