Relationships are stressful at any age. The rising divorce rates prove how difficult it is to live with someone. The psychological stress of marriage and long-term partnerships can have a negative effect on mental health.
Oftentimes, couple issues arise because of repressed emotions rising to the surface. The natural instinct is for emotional explosions to blow-up all over your partner.
But there are also other underlying issues. In a patriarchal society, women feel undervalued. This is also evidenced in how (most) relationships between older men and younger women are generally accepted by society, but when women are the older partner, people scoff and frown.
“Cougars” – the derisory term for mature woman dating a younger “cub” – are seen as sexual predators. Whilst women openly admit younger men satisfy their sex drive more than men over 40, these type of age-gap relationships have value beyond the bedroom.
Older Women Are Less Complicated
Some men prefer older women and exclusively date cougars. Reports investigating age-gap relationships reveal that men prefer drama-free relationships.
Mature women typically know what they want from life. This makes them calmer, more decisive and less impulsive. Their experience also makes them more knowledgable, interesting and capable of holding a meaningful conversation.
Younger women, on the other hand, don’t know where they fit into the world. The indecision and feeling of being undervalued typically lead to an inner conflict which is projected on to the outside world. And it is usually the partner that feels the force of your frustration.
Older woman are less inclined to party at nightclubs and noisy bars. They prefer relaxing atmospheres and cultured evenings. Venues that are less intense release endorphins (feel-good hormones). High-adrenaline evenings impact your mental and physical health.
Mental and Emotional Support
Ask a younger man what attracts them to older women and many will say they can be themselves. They feel more comfortable. Cougars give their young cubs more confidence and self-esteem.
The experience mature women bring with them helps to nurture a young man’s emotional and psychological wellbeing. They help them grow and mature much quicker than they ordinarily would in a relationship with women their own age or younger.
It is widely regarded in psychology that men subconsciously look for shades of their mother in lovers. This is especially true for men that did not receive sufficient emotional bonding with his mother as a child.
Older women, therefore, fill an emotional void. The relationship can be a healing process which releases repressed emotions and improve mental health.
In recent years, there has been a growing of age-gap relationships between older women and younger men. This pattern is reflected in the number of hook up dating sites which gives older candidates more scope to contact and impress younger subscribers.
Research has shown that women initiate first contact through online dating sites more often than they would in traditional environments. It is thought the anonymity of dating apps give women more control, choice and freedom to express themselves.
Derisory views of age-gap couples may never go away, but if more people recognized the benefits of symbiotic relationships, fewer people would suffer from mental health problems fuelled by stressful relationships.