An Unexpected Turn on the Road of Life

What I wanted my body to do, what it couldn't do, and what it did.

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres on our open platform. We publish pieces as written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Community stories are not commissioned by our editorial team and must meet our guidelines prior to being published.

It was around 6 am on a Saturday, and I was shuffling in and out of the bathroom and up and down the kitchen. It hurt to lay down, and it hurt to sit down. Standing wasn’t any better, so I started pacing slowly, and I yelled, “I wish I were a boy!” It was that time of the month, and I had horrendous cramps and was bleeding heavily. “Oh, for crying out loud, Lisa, stop talking like that!” my father answered. “You don’t wish you were a boy!” he continued, and then I fainted. I was fourteen years old.

This started two years before and kept getting progressively worse. Throughout high school, I would force myself to attend gym class if I was in pain. I hated getting my period! It wasn’t just an inconvenience; it controlled my life. During college, I would miss class and couldn’t work. My heating pad was my best friend. The only thing that gave me some relief was this new medication that came on the market: Ibuprofen.

On and on, the monthly ride went until age 24 when I was diagnosed with Stage 4 Endometriosis. Only after two laparoscopies that freed my bowel from the back of my uterus, a fallopian tube that was adhered to my uterus, the draining of a chocolate cyst and removal of endometrium on the outside of my uterus did I have some relief. I was told at that time that I had a 99.9% chance of NOT having children. I was thrown for a loop. This put life in perspective for me. I had just gotten engaged, and I wanted to have children. I told my fiancee that we could call off the wedding if that were a dealbreaker for him. I completely understood. He said that we could adopt; he wanted to spend his life with me.

We married, and we were going to start adoption proceedings, and I was going to have another laparoscopy. It had to be done within a specific time frame during my cycle, and the nurse needed to know when I started my period, except that I wasn’t getting my period. I was late. I had my period on my wedding day. I went for a blood test in the early morning, and at 2 pm, I got a phone call at work. The nurse said, “Are you sitting down?” “Yes,” I said softly. “YOU’RE PREGNANT!!!” I couldn’t believe my ears.

My pregnancy wasn’t easy. At thirteen weeks, I started spotting and rushed to the hospital, thinking that I was miscarrying. I was sent home after a while and told to call my doctor the next morning. That night I was upset, sad, and furious. How could life do this to me? I thought I couldn’t have kids, and now I’m pregnant, and this baby will be taken away from me. This isn’t fair! How could life be so cruel? I called my doctor the next morning, and he said that I had placenta previa. The placenta was partially covering the cervix and could deliver first, which would be life-threatening to the child and me. I was on bed rest for the rest of the pregnancy. Then I had an ultrasound at 36 weeks that showed that the placenta had moved, and I was able to have my healthy baby girl naturally.

My daughter was six months old when I discovered that I was pregnant again. How could this be with my history? I was dumbfounded. I couldn’t believe it. I was plagued with migraines with this pregnancy. After I gave birth to a baby boy, I was told not to have any more children; my body couldn’t take the stress. I continued to have migraines for years. The cramps came back, and at age thirty-three, I had a hysterectomy. It took almost two years for my hormones to level out and my migraines to subside a little. I haven’t had a period in 19 years, and I’ll tell you one thing, I haven’t missed it at all.

It wasn’t a rite of passage for me or something that I looked at with wonder and awe happening to my body every month and appreciating what my body could do. It was something I dreaded and that I had to plan my life around. Now without it, I don’t feel any less of a woman. I feel like I did before it ever came on the scene. I can do what I want when I want, and I don’t feel like crap. Sure I have the regular aches and pains one associates with age but no cramps!

This body didn’t always work the way I wanted it to work. At times it held me back and question the state of my health and if it would ever improve. It made me make decisions that I never thought I’d have to make, but it did end up carrying and birthing two beautiful human beings, and that miracle of birth was more than I thought it could ever accomplish.

Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...


Moms, Do Not Be Ashamed Of Your Postpartum Depression (From A Mother Of Four)

by Stephanie Marie

40 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger

by Srinivas Rao

Antwawne Kelly of ‘Inside Out Consulting Systems’: “The mental part of being an entrepreneur is very important”

by Karina Michel Feld

Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter

Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy.

Thrive Global
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.


We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.