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An Invitation to Say No.

Release overwhelm and say yes to what nourishes you.

Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash.
Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash.

When I found myself sitting at my desk with my blanket tucked under my legs wanting to pull it completely over my head as I read another email about a free workshop, I knew I needed to look within.

I’ve seen a level of generosity with time and resources that is truly heart-warming these past few months. There are countless people doing amazing things in the world right now. These people are my friends using their expertise to host workshops to help others learn new skills or how to cope. They’re also my mentors and thought leaders who I enjoy learning from so, it didn’t make sense that I just wanted to hide under my blanket.

What I found is the frustrated feeling is actually overwhelm. As someone who loves to learn, I want to take advantage of as many of these opportunities as I can. But with free webinars and workshops everywhere I look and courses now free or heavily discounted, it’s too much for me to take in at one time.

What became apparent to me is that I’ve got to quit being annoyed by these wonderful opportunities and start saying no to some of them.

I need to get back to my belief that what is meant for me shall not pass me and let go of the thought that I should be doing everything right this moment just because it’s a good opportunity or something I might need to know in the future. If you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, I encourage you to take a few deep breathes and say to yourself:

What is meant for me, shall not pass me.

Shortly after this realization I received an invitation from a friend to a LinkedIn workshop she was doing. I initially had that feeling of dread, ugh, another thing. Then I realized that workshop would actually benefit me right now. So, I signed up for it. Later I said no to one about naturally healing back pain – it sounds interesting but, I don’t even have back pain. Why would I say yes to that when there’s so many other nourishing activities I want to be doing?

Then, I took it a step further. I told myself even if it’s something I’m interested in, I don’t have to do it. I can say no. I mentioned this to a friend and she agreed saying it’s time to start treating these events like what they really are, an invitation. No one is expecting me to participate in every free offering, it’s a pressure I’ve placed on myself. I can choose to release that weight and only say yes to the offering that I have a strong desire to join.

Take a step back and check in with yourself before giving an answer.

Are you saying yes because it lights you up?

Because it could actually help you in some way?

Or are you saying yes because it’s free?

Because you should be learning that or you should be productive?

It’s never been easier to say no.

Another amazing thing with everything being online is that we actually don’t have to say no directly to the person providing the workshop or other service. Most of these offerings are sent via email or social media post and don’t require us to actually say no. By not responding or opting-in, we’re saying no. It’s really never been easier to say no. In this context, saying no is all about clarity for yourself. Decide what you want to give your energy to and stick with that. Don’t let an opportunity continue to drain your energy because you keep thinking that maybe you should do it anyway even though you know you don’t fully want to do it.

If you would benefit from the free webinar, workshop, 5-day summit, 30-day challenge, or heavily discounted service or product then say yes and completely embrace the experience! If you wouldn’t, say no. Release the feeling that you should be going or the feeling of guilt that you’re not going. Most of the people sharing what they know or have put together just want to help you, they don’t want you to feel bad. They’re inviting you in case what they have to offer will be of service to you. It’s completely okay to say, ‘No, thank you for thinking of me. It’s not for me right now.’ Then delete the email or scroll past the post and let that be the end of it for you.

It doesn’t make you a bad person. It doesn’t make you unproductive. What you’re doing right now is enough.

It makes you empowered because you are connected to yourself and aware of what you need to take care of yourself.

You can say no to one thing or all the things. You can say no so you can sit on the coach, go for a walk, read a book, bake with your kids. You don’t have to say no because you’re going to be doing something else “productive.”

Say no because it’s not what serves you best right now.

The choice is yours.

Say yes if you want. Just remember, it’s an invitation and you can always say no.

This is me, cordially inviting you to say no.

Tell me below, what’s something you want to say no to?

This article was previously published on kelliezeigler.com.

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