Once at a party my daughter leaned over to me and said she was ‘jealous’ that the little girl was getting presents and a celebration.
Contrary to what you may think I should have jumped to… I told her I understand how she feels. She is an only child and we didn’t have a lot of friends and family at the time in this new city. I told her that mommy is not angry with how she feels and that I am glad she told me. That she was courageous for admitting those feelings and now I can help her deal with them.
I gave her a hug and said “I know it may be a bit hard to watch her have a party, but I promise you when it is your day you will be celebrated too. Right now though, it is not yet your celebration so we must work on celebrating with the girl who we came to see.”
I told her that she can celebrate fully with this little girl and trust the promise that her celebration now does not steal my daughter’s for later. My daughter took a few moments to process the pain and then quickly moved to trusting the promise.
There are too many people who feel as though they cannot celebrate with others because they don’t trust their own promise. This makes for a bad party for everyone. Feeling a sting of jealousy is not something to be embarrassed about, but you shouldn’t allow yourself to get stuck in that space and unable to celebrate at someone else’s party.
We all have been given a promise, so don’t worry if today is not your day. Think of this: if you celebrate today with them that is just more partying for both of you…because your day is coming.
Learn to party even when it is not yet for your promise!