Over the past few months, I have been using Quora quite often in terms of posting content, sharing advice with people, reading interesting posts and have learned useful information from there.
I was reading through a section about life and people’s perspective towards it and how it has shaped them into the person they are today. I read some very powerful and life-changing posts. I took screenshots and saved them to my phone to read once in a while.
Since it had a positive impact on my life, I decided to put them all together in one article and share it with you all. (I wish I had saved the links to those posts).
Would be great to hear your 2 cents about each of them. Do comment below the article and share some of your own stories as it may help to change someone’s life for the best.
Perspective 1: Freak Accident
A family friend’s five-year-old child passed away in a freak accident. The father had just left the room for a few seconds to use the bathroom and the child was playing next to the television and tried to climb on top of it. As he did that the television fell down and crushed him.
This devastated the family and they never got over it. (I don’t blame them) The father undeservedly blamed himself for the death of his child and went into the depression for years.
I remember telling my dad, a stoic man who has only said he loves me maybe three times in his life, that “this is a reason that I don’t know if I want children. I don’t think I could handle such a thing”.
His responded: “Even one minute with you in my life is worth whatever pain I would feel if you had died”
To hear those words coming from him really showed me how strong that bond can be, even if a parent doesn’t show it openly. It really changed my mind about wanting children.
Perspective 2: So be Afraid
I was 13 years old, trying to teach my 5-year-old sister how to dive into the swimming pool. My sister was really nervous and afraid and it took quite a while to explain to her that she can do it. It was a public pool so there were other people also swimming. A 75-year-old woman was taking laps near us and would stop and watch us for a minute and then continue swimming.
About 30 minutes had passed and I was getting annoyed at my sister because she still didn’t dive and kept shouting “I’m afraid” “I’m so afraid”.
The old woman swam towards us and looked at my sister, raised her fist in the air and said, “So, be afraid! And then do it anyway!”
This happened about 35 years ago and I have never forgotten it. It was like a revelation – it’s not about being unafraid. It’s about being afraid and doing it anyway.
Perspective 3: Liberated
A few years ago I met a person in a wheelchair. He related a story about how a person once asked if it was difficult to be confined to a wheelchair.
He laughed and responded: “I’m not confined to my wheelchair – I am liberated by it. If it wasn’t for my wheelchair, I would be crippled in bed and never be able to leave my room or house. I can do whatever I want now and enjoy my life and blessings.
I got goosebumps and after that day never took my life for granted. What an amazing perspective.
Perspective 4: Make Mistakes
When I was a kid I remember going into my dad’s study room and accidentally broke his study lamp and was terrified. I kept thinking all day what will I say to him. He would be so angry and would probably ground me for a month.
When he came back home from work he saw the broken lamp and asked who did it. I admit to it.
He came towards me and calmly looked at me and said: “breaking something happens when you work, that’s ok, don’t worry”.
It’s silly, but I think of that almost every day. It’s okay to make mistakes, at least you are trying to do something.
Perspective 5: The 3 Decisions
When I was about 15 years old, my dad and I had an argument in private about something. He told me:
“Any decision you make in this house, you make three times. Once when you make it, once when your brother makes the same decision after watching you do it, and once when your little sister makes the same decision after watching you and your brother do it.
How you treat your brother will tell him how he can treat your sister, and how you treat your sister tells her how she will expect to be treated for the rest of her life, even as far as her future boyfriends or husband”
This shook me up and made me rethink my role as the oldest child. I started taking my responsibility as the role model a lot more seriously after that.
Perspective 6: It’s You and Me
I got married a few months ago and our marriage was far from perfect. We had constant arguments, disagreements and sometimes couldn’t stand each other. I grew up in a very hostile environment and we used to have arguments, personal attacks, fights all the time and there was never a mutual understanding. It was always about who was right and how to make the other person feel bad about their actions.
When I got married, I realized that the fighting habits I had from an early age were toxic for our relationship and my husband said something to me that changed my life forever and I used it in all my relationships.
He said, “It’s not You Vs Me, Love, It’s You and Me Vs the problem.”
We are always a team. It’s helped me overcome some serious problems in my personal relationship and I will never forget it.
Perspective 7: Forgive Yourself
When I was a young kid my father abandoned me twice. I grew up a very angry and a depressed man. I hated and resented him for doing what he did. In high school, I had an amazing teacher. He helped me and many other classmates of mine in so many ways. I will never forget him.
One day he came up to me and asked, “You hate him right” I said yeah. He then said “and he deserves it right” and I again said yes. Then he said, “Do you think he feels any of your hatred for him”.
I thought about it for a minute and answered: “No, he probably doesn’t feel my hatred”.
He said, “But you feel all of it. And you don’t deserve that. It’s time to forgive the man. Not because he deserves it. But because you do.”
He was completely right. I forgave my father, and over time have built up an incredibly close relationship with the man. I could never have gotten to this point without my teacher.
Perspective 8: Love Yourself
In terms of love, the truth is the only person you know you’re definitely spending the rest of your life with is You.
Everything else is simply not guaranteed no matter how much you believe in “true love”. People die, people leave, people change their minds. When all is said and done, you end up alone with yourself.
So you better like who that is. In fact, you better love who that is. Work every day to be your best self and don’t let ANYONE EVER define who you are without your permission.
Originally published at besomebody.com