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6 Strides of the Self-Empowered Single

“Self-Empowerment is seeking the solution rather than fixating on the problem.” -Coach Bobbi

Despite the fact that over 45% of Americans are single, singleness is still viewed as an anomaly (CNN). But why? We should be proud that we have CHOSEN singleness. Being single is truly a gift from God. It grants us the opportunity to reflect, discover, and advance into greater dimensions. More than anything, being single is so much better than being unhappy and stuck in a dysfunctional relationship. I believe singles should use this time to heal from limiting beliefs, create a vision, and develop a strategic plan that would allow them to execute their goals and catapult into the next level of success. The 6SSES is a proven system that will bring you guaranteed satisfaction and self-fulfillment. It does not matter if you are feeling stuck or are yearning for more. The 6SSES is for YOU! So, take a look at the tips below and follow them in the exact order to reach your moment of self-empowerment.

  1. Monitor Your Mind: Whether you believe it or not, everything that happens to you is a result of your thoughts. Our thoughts control our perspective and in turn our perspectives influence our lives. The way we perceive other people and experiences determines how we interact. How we engage and interact with outside forces ultimately ricochets back to us. Therefore, what we think, we project. The things we project, reflect back unto us. If you notice or feel that negativity always comes your way, ask yourself, “What am I thinking or projecting outwards to receive this?” or “What have I exposed my mind to?” In most cases, people would find that they were already thinking negatively, had done something unfortunate to cause their problems or digested negativity from someone or something around them.
  2. Maximize Your Mindset: Continuing from the first tip of monitoring your mind, to become empowered you have to learn how to maximize your mindset. By this, I mean, learning to think thoughts at a higher vibration. Turn the negative statements into positives because what we project, reflects back to us. For example, if someone always say, “I never win anything!” Then guess what? That person will never win anything, but if he or she switches their statement to “I always win because even if I lose, I win. This is just a lesson that I needed to learn.”, they will win everything. This person realizes that everything happens for a reason, so a loss right now only means a better win in the future.  This is HOW you have to think in order to maximize your mindset and reach your full potential. Furthermore, mindset is so important that the bible states, “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” (Philippians 4:8, KJV) Simply put, we should think good thoughts. So, maximize your mind and make sure you are thinking thoughts that bring you prosperity.
  3. Plan Your Purpose: Knowing and having a “why” keeps you focused on becoming your best self. Determine your purpose by asking yourself, “What or who am I passionate about? “and “Does my passion make me cry?” If your passion doesn’t make you cry, then get a new one. Your motivation is what is going to keep you centered and immovable in the face of discomfort. Therefore, it needs to hold sentimental value. It needs to be that one person you refuse to disappoint or the one thing that you refuse to settle for.
  4. Set SMART Systems: Setting smart systems simply means creating and accomplishing SMART goals. The acronym SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant (Results-Based), and Timely. Each of your goals should comply with each letter in the acronym. If your goals do not comply with each letter, you may need to make some adjustments. Keeping an ever-growing list of SMART goals allows you to constantly increase in your success. This is a system that has been proven successful for many others who set out to achieve big goals.  
  5. Prepare for Potholes: The journey to becoming empowered will not be easy. There will be many setbacks and obstacles. Use this step to plan ahead and make any adjustments to your goals before you even begin. Key questions to ask yourself as you are setting your goals are, “What obstacles may prevent me from completing this goal?” and “How can I prevent this obstacle from occurring?” This is also a crucial step to understand because you will not be perfect at accomplishing your goals or becoming as empowered as you want to be immediately. The good news is that no one is. Not even me. The most important thing is that you remain disciplined and diligent enough to persevere even when things are not going as you plan because mistakes and setbacks are a part of the process.
  6. Stay Soaring:  Becoming self-empowered is an ongoing process. It never ends. You must always seek opportunities to grow and monitor areas of your mind, heart, and life that may need changing. More so, it is inevitable that limiting beliefs and negative mindsets will resurface, but you must keep the faith, remember your why and reflect on how far you have come. It is your progress that matters the most.

Now that you have learned the 6 Strides of the Self-Empowered Single, it is your job to put these steps into action. Good luck!

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