When you know your value, you focus on doing what you do best. You let other people fill in the gaps where you don’t bring as much to the table. You are confident in the value you are contributing, and free yourself of the view you need to bill for your time or give ‘x’ number of hours. Likewise, when you know your values, you focus on what’s most important to you. You let go of the things that don’t serve yourself, your highest goals and the people you love most.
As part of my interview series on the five things you need to know to become a great author, I had the pleasure of interviewing Tamara Loehr. Tamara is a wellness entrepreneur, and Australian native who has been building businesses for 20+ years. Living on the beach and commuting to America, Tamara is a proud mother of two, with a stay-at-home daddy. Tamara is songwriter and a fine artist — with a love for animals and nature. Dedicated to empowering female-founded businesses, Tamara invests and supports businesses who have passion and purpose. Tamara believes women’s purchasing power will abolish animal testing and positively impact the world.
Thank you so much for joining us! Can you share a story about what brought you to this particular career path?
I believe in finding your tribe — a like-minded community where there is no B.S and no judgment. A place where you focus on being the best version of yourself: in business, self and family. I found my tribe through EO and YPO (Young Entrepreneurs Organisation). YPO has an average turnover of $45M U.S., but has less than a 10% female membership. Huh?! When it came to breadwinners, this is now 40% of women in the U.S.
What I discovered over my 20+ year journey as a breadwinner and entrepreneur, is that balance is B.S. The women who had managed to become part of this small group of 10%ers were those who blended everything, not trying to balance. This inspired me to write the book, as I felt compelled to share the formula for creating a life in which you can have the best of all worlds (work, self and family) without compromise and burnout.
Can you share the most interesting story that occurred to you in the course of your career?
In the school yard women would say to me ‘Congratulations on your business success. I love my career, but didn’t want to compromise on my family.’ There is a misconception at some point that I made a compromise. This is not only insulting to think I chose business over my family, but there is an assumption that it’s one or the other. The perception that I had to make a sacrifice is wrong.
I am not one to make compromises. I want to grow and expand in business, while being a mother and wife — and I’m not willing to sacrifice my sanity or health for it. Instead, I have learned how to feel abundance in all areas through blending.
It was at this point that I realized that I need to share this forum. My intention is to see more breadwinners blending, more women playing a bigger game in business, and less burnout.
Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
I used to assign my expertise to a value: hourly rate and time-based. This was a recipe for exhaustion. My transformation coach shifted my beliefs around value when she completed an exercise with me where she asked me two life-changing questions: 1. Do you know the value you bring? 2. Are you making decisions in your life based on your values?
When you know your value, you focus on doing what you do best. You let other people fill in the gaps where you don’t bring as much to the table. You are confident in the value you are contributing, and free yourself of the view you need to bill for your time or give ‘x’ number of hours.
Likewise, when you know your values, you focus on what’s most important to you. You let go of the things that don’t serve yourself, your highest goals and the people you love most.
Knowing your value and knowing your values helps you prioritize and make the best use of your time in all areas.
This was a vital exercise, and I now make all my decisions based on this model. Therefore, this is one of the first exercises you do in the book. This will become your compass for making decisions, setting healthy boundaries and saying ‘no’ to things that don’t serve you.
What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now?
It’s always my current project. I re-design my life every seven years or so. As I learn more, grow more, and want for different things, my environment needs to adapt. As a result, I find myself transitioning into new businesses every decade, even moving homes.
What was interesting to me in my 20s certainly doesn’t serve me now. I don’t believe that you need to stick to the career path you studied at your university. You can redesign your life. This doesn’t mean you are starting from scratch. You simply take your knowledge, your expertise and a tool box to a new environment that delivers on the things you value at that time.
Again, this is another exercise in the book where we explore what’s possible. For those who are feeling stuck or uninspired, you can re-design your life.
Currently, I am focused on two things: inspiring more women to start businesses or play a bigger game in the business they have. The statistics around women on boards, women CEOs and women turning over $1M, $10M or $100M+ is not where it needs to be.
My second focus is on impact. I believe ‘giving’ should be entrenched in every business sale — not something we do when we are profitable or a have larger businesses. Small businesses are the backbone to our economy, so if we all gave with every sale imagine the positive impact we could make. I am encouraging more small businesses to do the same by leading the way, first with disrupting the way woman buy beauty and wellness products.
What is the one habit you believe contributed the most to you becoming a great writer? (i.e. perseverance, discipline, play, craft study) Can you share a story or example?
I am an entrepreneur who believes in journaling, not authoring. The process of journaling is a powerful for not only collecting your thoughts, but working through your feelings and articulating your process. It was from my journaling that the book evolved. Had I not spent the years writing in moments of truth and struggle, I don’t believe I would have had as many transformations. The book certainly wouldn’t exist.
Can you share the most interesting story that you shared in your book?
I share a lot about my family. One story that resonates with a lot of mothers is titled ‘Mummy Don’t Go.’ The guilt you feel as a mummypreneur can sometimes be overwhelming. It’s important we put this into context.
Now, more than any other time in history, parents are spending more time with their kids. I don’t remember spending as much quality time with my parents growing up. I emphasize ‘quality.’ Not being around your kids while they watch TV, and you spend three hours cleaning and cooking.
When my daughter said to me “mummy, please don’t go” as I headed overseas for a work/self trip, I didn’t take that guilt onboard. I know I have a lot of quality time with my children. The way I chose to look at this, is by empowering her to see things differently and through me eyes.
My response was, “You love school, and get to go and see your friends every time you go. Mummy loves her work, loves traveling and meeting up with her friends. It’s something that makes us both happy and we both get to do it.”
What is the main empowering lesson you want your readers to take away after finishing your book?
You can have it all — you simply need a framework and the support of a like-minded tribe to achieve it. Once you have worked through the exercises in the book, you will know what your values are, define your personal pie and your non-negotiables, and have a blueprint for what your blended life will look like. You are not alone. My transformational coach and I are supporting anyone who has read the book in their transition through our Facebook page and courses for successful implementation.
What was the biggest challenge you faced in your journey to becoming a bestselling author? How did you overcome it? Can you share a story about that that other aspiring writers can learn from?
When I was approached to write a book, my first limiting belief was: ‘Do I want to put myself out there?’ Sharing your personal journals and standing for the life I have chosen is not going to being to shared.
My coach said “If people are not talking about you, then you aren’t doing something interesting. Your next lesson is the discipline to be disliked.” My mentor said “this story needs to be told, that’s why I chose you. If one out of 10 people read your book, and it makes a positive impact on their life and the world, then you are living out your legacy.”
Which literature do you draw inspiration from? Why?
I am addicted to learning, so I am constantly subscribing to new methods and books. For me, I find the best knowledge and literature is shared amongst my tribe: EO and YPO. After all, like-minded people tend to read and get inspiration from the same things.
How do you think your writing makes an impact in the world?
I believe experience sharing, not giving advice, is the best way to learn. I personally have had many ‘popcorn’ moments from the experience shares of other global entrepreneurs and mentors.
If the concept of blending becomes a widely used method, then exciting things can happen. The shift will bring about countless transformations in relationships, business and purpose. I’m excited to see what the future holds.
What advice would you give to someone considering becoming an author like you?
Write as if no one will ever read it other than your children when they grow up. When you start thinking about what people will think when they read it, it will limit your writing.
What are your “5 things I wish someone told me when I first started” and why. Please share a story or example for each.
Assuming you mean when I first started writing a book, not business.
1. Business takes twice as long, and twice as much time…the same applies for books.
2. Build the plane as you fly it…it will never be perfect. Just take the leap.
3. It’s about the journey. The people you invite to be part of the book, whether it be contributors or a team to help launch it, will make the process rewarding.
4. There is no money in books. It’s a labour of love.
5. Writing a book is like being a mentor: you both get something out of it.
You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
1. Work, life, BLEND.
2. IMPACT entrenched in every product sold.
How can our readers follow you on social media?
Thank you so much for this. This was very inspiring!
About the author:
Chaya Weiner is the Director of branding and photography at Authority Magazine’s Thought Leader Incubator. TLI is a thought leadership program that helps leaders establish a brand as a trusted authority in their field. Please click HERE to learn more about Thought Leader Incubator.