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5 Rules To Live by for Success, Happiness and Self-Esteem

All backed by research

Photo credit: Canva.com

Everyone chases the good life their way, but there are rules without which success will never take place.

So, today I made you a list of the five rules to live by if you want the best out of life. Check them out and let me see your response in the comments below.

Rule #1: Invest in Relationships

Everyone —including you— wants to make new friends, keep the old ones, have a reliable support system and have unusual romantic relationships. So it should make sense when I tell you to work on your social skills. People with excellent social skills are less lonelier and considered more attractive. These people are good at leading teams, and they make more money.
A 20-year study by Stanford University found that moving from the bottom fifth to the top fifth of popularity in class resulted in a 10 percent salary boost for that person. Another study on 4,000 top CEOs found that 60 percent of them are classic extroverts.

How to invest in your relationships? Eric Baker, bestselling author of Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong, recommends these four networking tips

  • Offer help to people and be a giver
  • Reconnect with old friends (this means less energy and higher return)
  • Connect with super connectors (those who knows everyone)
  • Always Follow up

Rule #2: Do Things with LOVE

I was watching a video for multimillionaire Tom Bilyeu talking about how he went from his kitchen to building a +$400 Million food company. He said that though he was always a hustler, he couldn`t get rich. It was only when he decided to quit his old job and build a product around weight-loss, a topic he was seriously interested in, that the things changed for the best.

When I was young, I watched Jack Nicholson said in an interview, “Chase success and the money will follow.” I couldn`t understand it until I later figured out that one can`t unblock his full potential doing boring stuff. Any work you do will feel like a choir. It`ll be ten times harder to be a top dog in your career or industry, and your ass will get kicked by the first enthusiastic hustler challenging you.

So, take some time to re-evaluate your goals and arrange them based on LOVE —without neglecting money of course. If you plan on pulling as many all-nighters as you can, then you`d better do it with a smile on your face.

Rule #3: Set Big Goals (in 10X)

The safest way to approach your future is to set bigger goals than the ones you need in the first place. Why? Because:

  • It brings out the best in you: A big juicy goal makes you raise the bar
  • You`re still guaranteed something even if you fail: You can chase after one client and get him, or you can chase 10 clients —of the same weight—, fail with six of them and get the other four. A 40 percent rate may not sound fancy, but if you look closely, that`s a 300 percent increase in your pay raise.
  • It eliminates the fear of failure: Fear of failure —FOF— is crippling. No one likes it. However, when you know that even when you fail, you`ll still come up with the juice —see the previous 10-clients example—, failure will mean less to you. If you have ten bullets and ten targets, it`s very rare that you miss on all of them.

Rule #4: Plan for Failure

Another way of overcoming FOF is to plan for it perfectly. I just watched a video by psychologist and author Richard Wiseman on visualization. Those who visualize victory win less frequently compared to the ones who anticipate obstacles and visualize themselves overcoming them.

Planning for failure works in all areas. Life is all about change, and you`ll get challenged more than you can ever imagine so do yourself a favor and plan for it. Do what the ancient Romans did —see the Pre-mortem Principle— and plan for setbacks before they become. You`ll feel more confident and win more. And failure ever happens, it will be less catastrophic and less bitter.

Rule #5: Gratitude Should Shape Your Life

Gratitude has too many health benefits for just one post. But what I want to highlight here is how gratitude shapes our expectations. First off, let`s agree that what you expect from yourself and life is what you`ll get —good or bad. 

If you think you`re miserable, you`ll see misery and bad luck, and if you think you`re lucky and can draw good things into your life, then that`s what you`ll get.

According to a study by The Ohio State University Comprehensive Cancer Center, patients who had psychosocial issues such as anxiety, depression, low optimism, or lack of social support before a hematopoietic stem cell transplant (HSCT) had a higher risk for hospital readmission and stayed longer when they were readmitted compared to those in better overall mental health.

Also, many of the studies done on lucky people, lottery winners, and happy 70+ year-old couples have proved that most of them rely on their good luck in having a positive attitude towards life. And that attitude usually comes from gratitude.

You should live with gratitude because it makes you positive. Counting your blessings will make you start to see how lucky and capable you are which will manifest in a much happier future.

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