Every marriage has its own set of trials and tribulations that must be overcome in order for the relationship to grow. But, sometimes there are too many trials, tribulations, or other issues for the marriage to succeed, therefore divorce may be the best option. Every marriage is different, so here are a few signs to determine when it is time to consider a divorce:
- They No Longer Feel Like Your Best Friend
One of the best parts of being married is being able to spend a lifetime with one of your best friends. Your spouse doesn’t have to be your best friend, in fact it’s healthy to have good friends outside your marriage. However, it’s important that you and your spouse communicate and share what’s going on in your lives, as you would with a good friend. What’s more, your spouse should be your go-to person – someone who will be in your corner no matter what the situation is.
As time goes on, that friendship may become strained, or even worse, fractured. A lack of trust or unwanted criticism can lead to you feeling distant from your spouse. You may find yourself not wanting to talk to them about things going on in your life, or vice versa. Sometimes, this break can be repaired and you will find your relationship stronger than ever. Other times, despite your best efforts, it may feel like a wall is being built between you and your spouse, and this may be a sign that it’s time to consider a separation or divorce.
2. Overcompensating About Your Life
Most people tend to exaggerate a little bit when telling others about what’s going on in their life. This also applies to our marriages – sometimes when a marriage is going through a rough patch, we may exaggerate how great things are. When talking to friends and family, you may find yourself talking your spouse up and focusing on their good qualities, instead of being completely honest.
While it’s always good to talk positively about your spouse, sometimes this can be done to try and subconsciously cover up some of their more negative qualities. This issue has become more common with the rise of social media. You may write posts about how great your spouse is when in real life, you are barely interacting. Oftentimes, we don’t even realize we are doing this, as it can serve as a form of protection when your marriage is in shambles. But, there are some problems that simple “Band-aid” will not fix, and, for that reason, and in my experience as a divorce lawyer in Bergen County, New Jersey, and Monmouth County, New Jersey, this is when it may be time to consider seeking a top divorce lawyer to evaluate your case.
3. You Never Argue or Argue Too Frequently
Another sign to consider a divorce is if the communication is “off.” Every marriage has times when you do not agree with each other, and these can sometimes lead to arguments. While no one wants to be in an argument with their spouse, it’s actually very healthy to get things off your chest. No one will always agree on every subject, and it’s important that neither you nor your spouse is unable to voice their opinion – no matter what. You may hear people say, “Oh, my spouse and I never argue.” However, a lack of arguing can be a sign of a lack of interest in the marriage.
This is also a red flag that it might be time to reach out to a divorce lawyer. If you and your spouse can’t seem to agree on any issue, that’s a serious problem.
It is important to understand that your marriage may go through rough patches where you seem to fight all the time, or you feel like your spouse doesn’t have your back. You may fall prey to social media and overcompensating things in your life and marriage. Many times, recognizing the problem is half the battle when it comes to repairing issues in a marriage. Recognizing that certain issues can’t be fixed, while painful, helps you accept that divorce imminent, and is the best option moving forward. If you do ever find yourself in a position where divorce imminent, do your research, as there are many articles available about what traits make for the best divorce lawyer.
This article contains general information and opinions from Sheena Burke Williams and is not intended to be a source of legal advice for any purpose. No reader of this article should act or refrain from acting on the basis of information included in this article without seeking legal advice of counsel. Sheena Burke Williams expressly disclaims all liability with respect to actions taken or not taken based on any content in this article.