I don`t know if you`re familiar with the name Kamal Ravikant. He`s Silicon-Valley entrepreneur and bestselling author who, upon losing all his money, spent months in his bed depressed and unable to normally function.
He was at the lowest point of his life, he could no longer deal with life and was and, if not for his loving friends, he would`ve committed suicide. Ravikant`s life changed upside down when he woke up one day and decided he would love himself like never before.
He spent the following days repeating “I love myself” hundreds of times until his mental and physical health began to improve.
Soon, that mantra became a commitment and the way that eventually helped Ravikant not only find his entrepreneurial success but also his confidence and peace of mind. So yes, self-love works if you take it seriously and work hard to build it. Below are twenty-four acts of self-love backed that will improve how you appreciate and feel towards yourself.
- Do you feel not loved? Ask yourself “What makes someone fall in love with me?” Then list five qualities and make sure you read them every day (It`s only two minutes).
- Keep a self-appreciation journal. Studies found that how you finish your day is as important as how you start it. So make it a daily habit to list the most significant three things you`ve done for the day. This will boost your confidence, improve your focus and give you a steady stream of validation.
- Get a new meditation map. You may already have one, but new stuff usually makes you want to use them.
- Use that map you just bought and meditate. You can`t imagine how harmful stress is to your health. A recent survey found that 75 percent of adult Americans report experiencing at least one stress symptom in the last month. A 2008 survey also found that 52 percent of people said they stay awake at night due to stress. Another 40 percent said their stress levels made them want to cry. So meditate today before it’s too late.
- If possible, pay someone to do work for you. According to this report of a study, using the money to buy time will make you happier.
- Each day, and before you hit the office, write down when exactly do you want to finish work. Experts believe setting a work deadline is critical to productivity and will prevent you from being burned out which—according to studies—will make you depressed.
- Find a way to come up with the money and plan for a decent trip next summer. Researchers found that buying experiences is more likely to make people happier than possessions.
- What if you can’t travel? List 10 experiences/places that you want to explore this quarter. Concerts, seminars, workshops, speed dates, movie nights…etc.
- Save some money for clothes. It doesn’t matter if it’s $50 or $5 a day, just make sure you buy stuff that fits you and doesn`t rely much on jeans. People often wear jeans when they feel depressed.
- Studies have found that significance and leaving a legacy are two key metrics of the good life. So to make sure you improve your life, I want you to narrow your focus to only one or two goals to accomplish this year. Clarity won`t just make you feel better. It will also make you productive.
- Reconnect with one old friend each week. I know you’re busy with your neck but did you know that having a set of good friends is worth up to an extra $112,000 a year regarding life satisfaction. On the other hand, studies also found that few, or no, friends at all can give you depression.
- Call your old friends or track them on Facebook then ask them out. Many will be happy to reconnect with you again.
- Look inside your social circle for someone who meets the following criteria:
- Older than you by 10-20years
- Successful in their own field
- Kind enough to give you advice. The next step is to ask that person to be your mentor. A 1985 study on successful athletes found that every single participant had a great mentor at one point in their lives. Another one found that a good mentor can increase your salary by 28.8 percent. If you can’t find a nearby mentor, you can search the internet for an experienced coach and offer them help and/or money in exchange for mentoring you.
- List five qualities—other than looks—that your future partner must have. According to relationship expert Athol Kay, listing these qualities is critical for having a healthy marriage. If you know what you’re looking for and only ask out those who meet your criteria then whoever you fall in love with will make a great husband/wife who will make you feel loved.
- Make it part of your experience to make eye contact with people everywhere, especially when talking to them. Making eye contact is the one critical skill that will make you connect with people faster and make you confident around them. You want confidence in your life, don’t you?
- Give journaling a try and make it a habit. It will help you cope with negative thoughts and feel cool before difficult tasks. More importantly, journaling will make you understand yourself since most of your negative thoughts are automatic and hard to spot by mere thinking.
- List five people who mistreat you, and ditch one of them for good. Ditching one abusive friend will give you enough courage to do the same with the rest.
- Pick a handful of self-love quotes to live by this year. Read them every day for three minutes and memorize them. If you do all this, you will see a positive change in 1-3 months.
- Find three things to be grateful for every time you make tea or order coffee. Why coffee and tea? Because you`re more likely to make gratitude a habit if you tie it to something you regularly do.
- Have a plan, rewrite it every week and mentally revise it every morning. A study by psychologist Robert Epstein found that having a plan is the most effective tool to reduce stress. This is because planning helps you identify and prepare for any future obstacles which make you feel in control, confident and motivated. Planning is simple:
- Pick two goals
- See yourself getting there
- Write down how all the expected barriers as well as your WHY.
- When you procrastinate, say “I Forgive Myself” out loud. What I`m saying is pure science, not a cheesy tip. Studies found that students who forgave themselves for procrastinating on studying for one test subsequently procrastinated less on a second one. So, yes. You will perform, and feel, better if you forgive yourself for slacking off.
- Take a look at your music collection(s) and delete anything that it sad or downbeat (or at least listen to them “occasionally.” Music has the ability to bring you down or make you feel sad and hopeless or happy and powerful.
Give away your old clothes to charity. Helping someone else and you’ll automatically feel good about yourself. Donating money will also make you happy. Make it a habit of giving away from one to five pounds/dollars (insert your currency) every single day. And also remember to graciously tip table servers at restaurants and fast-food workers. Situations like these will make you feel good about yourself for days.
- Since you’re becoming kind to people, why don’t you be kind to yourself and improve your self-talk? Talk to yourself positively for at least three minutes a day. If you make this a habit, your mental health will shift in a very short time.
- Did you know that improving your sleep gives you the same mental satisfaction of someone who’s just won a $278,000 lottery? Yes, here’s the study. So start taking care of your sleep and make sure you sleep for at least six hours during the night.
Originally published at goodmenproject.com