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2 Step Formula to Stop Comparing and Be Happier

I was praising my 4 year old daughter for being an awesome climber when my 7 year old pitched in asking if I thought he was as good at climbing as his sister was. It made me pause and ponder about the inherent need to be recognized and acknowledged, right? I was reflecting on one […]

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I was praising my 4 year old daughter for being an awesome climber when my 7 year old pitched in asking if I thought he was as good at climbing as his sister was.

It made me pause and ponder about the inherent need to be recognized and acknowledged, right?

I was reflecting on one of my coaching calls with a client who is very successful.

When we first started working together, he was plagued by the fear that he was not as good a leader as other leaders in his industry.

I wondered about the reason we compare?

If you have fallen into the trap of comparing yourself to others, I invite you to ponder on the gain you get by comparing?

On the surface, you might say that you get no gain.

But if you dig deeper, it keeps you safe, does it not? It gives you an illusion that maybe by striving harder, you will be seen as successful.

If that’s you, I invite you to read on — Let me ask you now…

How much harder do you have to work?

How much more proving do you have to do to see yourself as good enough.

Yes, it comes down to valuing yourself.

Have you considered the fact that there is ONLY one of you on this planet?

In fact, there will ONLY be one of you ever.

Even if you believe in past/future lives, there will never ever be anyone with the same DNA, your unique energetic and genetic makeup.

When I reflect back on my childhood, I remember constantly wanting to be like my older sister.

In my mind, she was smarter, balanced and more loved than I was.

It took a lot of work, well into my 20’s to realize and recognize that it was all made up stories in my head.

I had created stories and lived my life in accordance with those stories.

This work requires deconditioning of the old patterns and stories that no longer serve you.

So, dear Visionary, let me ask you — why are you degrading yourself by comparing?

What if you let that go and fully embraced that you’re an incredible being doing the best you can.

Can you acknowledge and celebrate the unique BEing that you already are.

However, you may realize that the habit of comparing might be hard to beat for some of you because you have done it for so long.

In those instances, here are two steps to let go of comparing.

  1. Write down every single thing in your life that has been amazing for you. Smallest to the biggest. Write that down somewhere where you can see if you’re struggling.
  2. Stay in your lane. Celebrate the person that you found yourself comparing to and come back to your lane. You have your zone of genius and they have theirs. I invite you to make this your mantra “ my success is inevitable”.

Would you still compare if you knew that there was enough pie in the sky for everyone.

We are all here on this planet at this time in evolution for a reason.

We all have a role to play whether you believe it at this time or not.

If you want to dive deeper into this topic, I invite you to listen to my podcast Episode # 55 — “What Happens When You Compare”.

Please leave a review when you’re there if you have found value in my podcast.

To continue to be immersed in content like this, I invite you to follow me on Instagram and LinkedIn.

Wishing you a Happy Spring,

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